The other morning I was getting around to go to the gym, when I decided instead of taking my water bottle that won’t really close all the way, I got a dollar out to buy one at the gym. Oh wait a minute it’s now 2 dollars.. ok ready, got there oh look they have closed east bound West Main (right in front of the gym). Detour time.
Okay I’m at the gym, the water machine is dark and it is very empty..put my money in, the last bottle of water gets stuck against the glass door. No amount of kicking or shaking the machine made the bottle budge. Very annoying. Jill, who was working the desk came in and tried to help me to no avail. She mentioned she too was having a bad day, she found out her good friend did not wake up that morning….she was gone…..Oh my God you could see in her young face she had not, could not, comprehend how it happened. One day here the next day gone..I hugged her and told her how sorry I was and found out that her friend was only 23.
Let me say right here I was not in any way having a bad day. She was suffering from a bad day and still in shock. Grief comes to us in many different ways and does not totally leave. We think that if you know someone is terminally ill it would be different, but it is not. When there is a sudden loss, guilt, blame, if only’s, add a dimension that sometimes is often debilitating. Regardless, grief therapy is never a bad idea.
In the late 1970’s, I had a good friend that went in for a hysterectomy and didn’t go home. We never know when it will happen. In my own case, my husband and I knew he was terminal but the night he died it was unexpected. And I had a lot of shoulda could haves. I kept screaming “I’m not ready” to his lifeless body.
So here I will ask you to look back and think how grief has affected you and your family and friends and how you all handle it on a day to day basis. I would love to hear from you. Prayer works for me.